Farewell to costly illusions

It was one month ago that I decided to end an unhealthy relationship.

Sure, it provided me with company throughout the long winter months, adding a flicker and glow of comedic relief after dinner and many a long day in the working world.  

Problem was that this relationship became stale, intrusive - and costly. I needed a change in lifestyle.  I wanted to discard some unhealthy habits - and cut expenses.  I was starting to feel like one of my furry, floppy roommates.

On April 23rd, I gave the 30-day notice to cancel our cable TV service.  Apparently, I am not alone:

• More Canadians cutting the cord? TV subscriber numbers fall for first time (May 2014) http://www.theglobeandmail.com/report-on-business/more-canadians-cutting-the-cord-tv-subscriber-numbers-fall-for-first-time/article18685129/

• Statistics Canada Annual Cable Television Survey (February 2014) 
  http://www23.statcan.gc.ca/imdb/p2SV.pl?Function=getSurvey&SDDS=2728

In my new phase of life, I want to explore new interests and embrace new passions. I still want relationships that provide joy and laughter but more so through social gatherings, live theatre and the lost art of story telling.  How about you?

We still use our huge-ass television set to watch movies via Netflix, DVDs and yes, even our cherished old VHS tapes. 

Last night, one of the young folk and I watched our copy of The Truman Show. It had been a while since we last viewed this family favourite during one of our regular movie nights.  

It's a very interesting story with Jim Carrey portraying a character who starts to question his life, what is real and what is fabricated.  Some of us need to do that on a regular basis.   

Philosophy links regarding The Truman Show:

• http://philosophynow.org/issues/32/The_Truman_Show 
• http://www.philfilms.utm.edu/1/truman.htm 

I've often advised my children to ask questions, to resist virtual distractions and encouraged them to read Sophie's World, A Novel About the History of Philosophy by Jostein Gaarder [a review].  One of them even helped me with an illustration for a wee web project many years ago.

Some of us need frequent reminders to jog our curiosity, to challenge our perception of what is real, what really matters in our life and in our varied relationships.  

In most areas of our lives, we have the freedom to choose.  We are each the star of our own TV show, each the author of our own life story. How will it end? 
  
I think it's healthy to ask questions, to challenge the status quo and leave one's comfort zone once in awhile.  We may just realize that we have been conveniently led back into the cave of illusions and shadows.  

Thanks for dropping by.  Feel free to rate this post using one of the check boxes below or offer a comment.  You have a choice :o)

If you like my writing style, you may enjoy reading The Year of the Rabbit - A Novel About Fate, Family and Forgiveness.

• Drop by the novel's domain;
• Read some excerpts;
• Read comments from others;
• Download a portion of the eBook for free from Smashwords.

T

Warming up to Spiritual Traditions

Sunday morning reading

I have been up for hours due to the whining of one hungry feline, a full bladder and the joyous noises of the young family living below.  

I sat in my morning fogginess, sipping my first cup of instant coffee, and read a few blog entries by womanly writing acquaintances. One is sharing tidbits about pancakes, mardi gras and the preparation for Lent.  Another is lamenting the approach of Valentine's day and weighing the benefits of being an older, single woman.  

As a recovering Catholic, I read the former while recalling distant memories of long, boring church services.  One could say that since publishing the novel, I am leaning towards the irreverent.  I don't wait until the start of Lent to share in a pancake feast.  That's almost a bi-weekly tradition in our home.  

Enjoying my singledom, I chuckled at the latter's musings.  Except for the vague "be my valentine" invitation from an eccentric male acquaintance, I don't expect much these days.  It's not that I've given up... it's more like I have become wary of consumerized expectations.  I also have some apprehensions due to how some people interpret love and distort a relationship into one of abusive entitlement rather than gentleness and mutual respect.     

As the jaded fog clears, I acknowledge the new moon, the worldwide and beyond celebrations of the Chinese New Year, the Year of the Snake.  I have a list of things to acquire at the store. I just need a few more tasty treats to enhance the meal and gathering of family and friends in le petit apartement.  

As I leaf through Spiritual Traditions: Essential Teachings to Transform Your Life, I appreciate and respect the similarities of world religions and belief systems.  

I value my journey, exploration and opportunities to share common goals or beliefs with others while respecting those who differ.   

What it comes down to is that anyone can choose to begin the day feeling gratitude, joy and compassion.  

Sometimes, one needs a little boost from a cup of hot coffee.

T

Transitions and wardrobe malfunctions

This deep blonde entry is for those who are also going through transitions, either personally or professionally. 

In addition to Middle Age, the following are a few more books I have been reading lately, addressing personal, artistic and professional transitions. 

While out and about town a few weeks ago, I visited a branch of the Ottawa Public Library I hadn't been to before.  Although they didn't have the exact books I was looking for, I picked up a few that were related. 

Transitions - Prayers and Declarations for a Changing Life by Julia Cameron

http://www.amazon.ca/Transitions-Julia-Cameron/dp/0874779952

"Julia Cameron shares beautiful prayers of empowerment followed by potent declarations and reflections on the nature of change and coping."

This book is the perfect size for reading while riding or waiting for a city bus.  In previous years, I have also read and attempted the 12 week program from Julia Cameron's The Artist's Way.  I really got a lot of benefit from the morning pages exercise. 

"The Artist’s Way is the seminal book on the subject of creativity. An international bestseller, millions of readers have found it to be an invaluable guide to living the artist’s life."

Selected quotes from Transitions:

• It is good to have an end to journey toward, but it is the journey that matters in the end.  - Ursula K. Le Guin

• To keep a lamp burning, we have to keep putting oil in it. - Mother Teresa

• People need joy, quite as much as clothing.  Some of them need it far more. - Margaret Collier Graham

That last quote goes out to the other middle aged lady I encountered, running errands today in the 30 C plus heat.   Sweetheart, the next time you head out on a breezy, hot day in a light sun dress, please remember to wear panties.  Parking lot up-drafts can be embarrassing - for everyone!  I don't feel so silly now for wearing my big, floppy sun hat.

The next book is one that was interesting yet a little to tiring to read all the way through.  Yes, I skipped a few pages, looking for gems and interesting bits.

Light in the Dark Ages: The Friendship of Francis and Clare of Assisi by Jon M. Sweeney

http://www.amazon.com/Light-Dark-Ages-Friendship-Francis/dp/B002UXS33G

 
"The Middle Ages were not so very dark, as the old textbooks say. As you will discover in this intriguing portrait of the first Franciscans, we live in dark ages whenever we become preoccupied with power. In this popular history, Jon Sweeney reveals the timeless temptations that come with being human---greed, competition, ego, and selfishness---as well as the many ways that Francis and Clare of Assisi inspired change and brought light into darkness."
 

This book is also the perfect size for reading while riding or waiting for a bus. I wonder if Francis was a disenchanted youth and had daddy issues.  Perhaps his spiritual life in nature could be compared to the 1960's hippie commune movement.   Kudos to him for helping the lepers when not many others would.  I cannot understand his marriage to lady poverty and dislike for owning books - even religious ones.  He did not like to own things. 

I'm sure some of my family and friends thought my downsizing efforts a few years ago were a little extreme with my new-found minimalist desires.  I consider Francis' rule for not owning more than one garment a little severe and ... would be unhygienic by today's standards.  Maybe that lady in the parking lot had her other set of underwear in the laundry?  

Francis believed in only cooking enough food for the current day and saving none for the next.  He lived in the moment.  He obviously didn't have a family to cook for, to pack and freeze casseroles and containers for meals throughout the week.

Seriously, people need to work to survive and support their families using as many economical tactics and time management techniques as possible.  You have to be efficient and penny-wise to make it in this modern world.  In addition to volunteering, I see gainful employment as an important part of contributing to society.

My heart goes out to folks at RIM and the federal government who have recently learned that their jobs may be cut.  On that related note, the last book I will mention is called Promote Yourself, book focused on self marketing by Anita Caputo of the Big Picture Institute.  

Anita is also a public speaker and co-author of Learn to Bounce, a book that came out shortly after she and hundreds of others were laid off from Nortel.  I saw her speak at a professional development seminar a couple of weeks ago and was so impressed and inspired that I purchased a copy of Promote Yourself.  It's "a practical guide to marketing yourself without being too pushy or too shy!".  Being content and sufficiently challenged in my present employment, I mainly wanted to garner tips for promoting my nom de plume, Florence T Lyon. 

Thanks for reading this far.  I hope I spaced out my thoughts and paragraphs enough for a pleasant experience.  

I like reading.  I like reading paper books.  I'm sure you do too.  Do you also like to read books on your Sony, Kindle, iPad, Kobo or other electronic devices?  As a reward for your patience, permit me to offer you a discounted eBook copy of my novel, The Year of the Rabbit.  Drop by before July 31st though.

Thanks for visiting.  Relevant comments are welcome.  Please +1, like and share and remember:  Semper ubi sub ubi. 

T

What's in a name?

In a post from last year I offered the question "What is Family".  Today I want to explore the history of family names.  

Where did they come from?   How did families get their last names? Did most families take their namesake to heart and protect its honour to the death?  I suppose one could ask the Hatfields and McCoys. 

Since today marks the celebration of Beltane, I feel compelled to unearth the origins of the Robinson family name.  It was due to pagan rituals and the phallic maypole that young maidens were led dancing into the forest for lusty initiations with the Green God (or his representatives). Nine months later, the families didn't know what to call these bastard babies so chose Sons of Robin or Robinson.

You see, my family may be descendents of Robin Greenwood or Robin of the Wood. I honoured the discovery of this origin in a poem ten years ago.  Despite the bastardly references, I like to think we have the green blood of nature and essence of mythology coursing through our veins.


In The Year of the Rabbit, a novel about Fate, Family and Forgiveness, there are a few family names worth looking into.  The Fletcher family name came about after researching options during the novel drafts.  A fletcher was a person who made arrows.  Matthew Fletcher was adopted and learned the carpentry trade from a Seguin Sound carpenter named Jim Robinson.  I made up the Vinoletti  name to represent a family of vintners from Italy.  


Returning to the Beltane reference, the novel contains some lusty frolicking in the forest that produced a teen pregnancy and the eventual birth of a much-loved February baby.  

Adult-content rating at Smashwords:

This book contains content considered unsuitable for young readers 17 and under, and which may be offensive to some readers of all ages.


Your mother may not approve.  Tsk, tsk.

A Favourite Blonde Author Offers Straight and Narrow

New Mystery by Sigrid Macdonald, Straight and Narrow

Several years ago, Sigrid Macdonald published a book called D’Amour Road, which was loosely based around the true-life disappearance of an acquaintance of hers in Ottawa. She has since discontinued that book and rewritten large parts of it. The final outcome is Straight and Narrow, a darkly witty mystery with complex subplots.

Right before her fortieth birthday, Lisa Campana goes missing. Her best friend, Tara, is devastated and bewildered. Has Lisa broken her sobriety or has she gone into hiding because she is afraid to tell her partner, Ryan, that she's pregnant and he may not be the father? Worse, Ryan has a history of battery. Could he have harmed her? Take a roller coaster ride with Tara Richards as she falls headfirst into a comical midlife crisis while dealing with the grave situation of searching for her missing friend.

I was one of the earlier readers of D'Amour Road way back in  2007.  Seems like a long time ago in Internet measurements.  I liked the fact that the National Capital FreeNet was mentioned as a resource during the search for Lisa.  

You can get the Straight and Narrow Kindle edition at Amazon.   

Sigrid is one of my favourite blonde writers - and friends.  Read about her other books and her services at the Copy Editing and Critiques blog. 

Young Adult Fiction and Romantic Delusions

I watched the movie "Young Adult" with my young adult residents on RoD last night. It wasn't as funny as we thought it would be, based on the previews. It was actually quite serious - about a 37 year old woman who is depressed and bordering on alcoholism (plus she's a writer -  go figure!). 

She goes back to her home town to try and win back her ex-boyfriend, to rekindle an old flame.  Of course she's delusional since he's happily married to a wonderful woman with whom he has parented a baby.

I think it's a good story with fair warnings about mental health, addictions, misunderstanding what is "happiness".  The character goes through great pains to make herself aesthetically attractive on the outside but man! does she have a lot of work to do on the inside.  She's one delusional, crazy prom queen!

Young Adult

2011 Soon after her divorce, a fiction writer returns to her home in small-town Minnesota, looking to rekindle a romance with her ex-boyfriend, who is now happily married and has a newborn daughter.

Details at:  http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1625346/

As a writer and published author, I found a couple of scenes touched me personally:

1. At least twice, Mavis makes a point of correcting people adding that she is an "Author" after they compliment or mention her status as a "Writer".  (the nerve!)
2. In the home town book store, Mavis is offended when the clerk informs her that the series of Young Adult books for which she ghost writes is on the clearance table.  She loses it when he informs her that the books will have no value if autographed and the store has to return them to the publisher.  (Ouch!)

My novel The Year of the Rabbit contains many themes and one of them is the desire to put things back the way they were.  In many cases, life does not allow us that option.  In one case, all it takes is the encouragement and unexpected wisdom of an 11 year-old girl.

The Year of the Rabbit is published as an Ebook with Smashwords where authors can decide if or what discounts can be applied to the sales.  I can't autograph it for people but can offer a taste of reader comments and a 20% free download.   

Please note:  This book contains content considered unsuitable for young readers 17 and under, and which may be offensive to some readers of all ages.

To close the loop of this post with the subject of "old flames", I recently received a Facebook friend request from someone I knew as a kissable boy in my home town.  I responded with a message acknowledging that many years have passed and… a request to see a profile picture before I approve the connection.  I'm curious, not shallow :o)

- - - 

Thank you for reading this far.  If you like my writing style, explore other posts in this blog and the many posts in the blog for my novel The Year of the Rabbit.

T

Morality Police or Commerce Bully?

Well, this is not good news...

PayPal is forcing online publishers to pull "erotica" content from their sites.  They don't think US adults can make mature choices on what content to view, read or purchase. 

This recent move is bordering on censorship and is unfair.  Read my rant here. Read what the EFF has to say. 

Erotica and its sub-categories are not my cup of tea.  My novel is published with Smashwords.  Although it has some titillating scenes, it is not considered erotica.  

Don't let this recent un-development put a damper on the "Read an Ebook" celebrations in the US.  Do drop by and get 75% off The Year of the Rabbit until March 10th.   

The book contains content considered unsuitable for young readers 17 and under, and which may be offensive to some readers of all ages.

 

The next time I see you

The 2012 new year brought with it hope and opportunities.  It also delivered an unexpected sorrow.

I was wondering why I could not reach a dear older lady friend by telephone before and during the Christmas holidays.  I knew she would leave her tiny downtown apartment during the day to get in some exercise, fresh air and visit a local women's centre.  Due to family, work and volunteer obligations, I forgot to call during the times when I knew she would, she should be home.  

Communication options were limited.  She did not have email or an Internet service.  My friend was from a different time.  She did not have a cell phone (as far as I know) nor did she have an answering service on her home land line.  When I remembered to call her during the Christmas holidays, the phone would just ring and ring…  Maybe she was out, I thought.  Maybe she was visiting family.  Various obligations pulled at my attention once again.

It was through a shared friend's Facebook direct message weeks ago that I learned she had recently passed away.  A wave of sadness washed over me.  I could not concentrate. I paused during the day to recall our first encounter through a volunteer organization almost 25 years ago, how we would meet on a weekly basis.  She was a hard working immigrant who needed help with reading and writing. I also helped her study for her citizenship test - mostly by illustrations and memorization.  She was successful.  

We lost touch during the years I was married, helping to raise a young family and working full time.

The last time we got in a visit was when I took my sweet lady friend out for a birthday dinner in the heat of last summer.  I remember her sitting in the cool restaurant, wearing a lovely hat and smiling as she squinted to read the card I gave her.  I also gifted her with a printed copy of my novel and hoped secretly that she would be able to read it.  I refrained from asking if she had continued with her literacy tutoring.   It just didn't seem like the time or place to ask.

 

I remember her giggles when the Restaurant Joy staff brought out a small serving of deep-fried banana with a single birthday candle planted in it.  She sat in gracious silence while we sang Happy Birthday in her honour. She was still coy about revealing her age. 

Similar to our outing last December but at an opposite weather extreme, our walks were slow.  I carried her tote bag.  I paced my steps to hers as she shuffled down the middle of the sidewalk, avoiding the risk of falling off the curb.  I paused when she paused to say hello to acquaintances on the street.  We visited Tim Horton's to enjoy their air conditioned setting, to chat over a refreshing drink.

The last time we connected on the phone was in the autumn, around Thanksgiving.  During our last telephone conversation, I suggested she think of a place where she would like to go for lunch or dinner for our next outing.  Planning for these outings was a chore because I had to perform research, to call places ahead of time confirming if they were accessible.  Aside:  I wish more art galleries, community centres and restaurants would post this very important requirement on their web sites!  During our last conversation and as usual, I asked how she was feeling.  I knew she had some health concerns and difficulty getting around but I did not know she was concealing the fact that her aging body was being consumed by Cancer. 

Last weekend, I took two busses downtown to attend one of the visitations at the funeral home.  I delivered my card of condolences.  I obtained a memorial card with her photograph on the cover and a prayer inside. There was no shortage of attendees from her women's centre and the various churches she frequented. 

I found a seat near the front of the room, close enough to the open casket containing my friend's mortal body.  I could not bring myself to approach the front.  This was not how I wanted to remember her.  The floodgates opened.  I cried and cried.  I retreated to the ladies room.  My energy was sapped.  I pulled myself together long enough to talk with her family members and a pastor then ... made a quiet exit.

Recalling again our last phone conversation during which we exchanged our interest in each other's lives and learning what was new.  She acknowledged my busy schedule and was understanding of the challenges of taking public transit downtown on weekends from my family's new home.  She extended her greetings for my children, to give them a hug and to "Tell them I love them."  

My friend is traveling back to her country of origin to a final burial place.  I will never see her again except for the photographs in my albums and the lovely photograph on her memorial card. 

I will miss her sweet voice, her smiling face and positive outlook on life.  

I miss my friend. 

What is Time...

New Year's Eve is upon us.  It's still morning in Ottawa yet some places in our wonderful world are already celebrating 2012's arrival.


One part of me appreciates the human need to measure and track things like distance, space and time in set increments.  I can also appreciate and respect the measurement of time in natural cycles.  

Years ago, I came across in interesting quote about time by a lady named Sarah Ban Breathnach:  


"Chronos is clocks, deadlines, watches, calendars, agendas, planners, schedules, beepers. Chronos is time at her worst. Chronos keeps track. ...Chronos is the world's time. Kairos is transcendence, infinity, reverence, joy, passion, love, the Sacred. Kairos is intimacy with the Real. Kairos is time at her best. ...Kairos is Spirit's time. We exist in chronos. We long for kairos. That's our duality. Chronos requires speed so that it won't be wasted. Kairos requires space so that it might be savored. We do in chronos. In kairos we're allowed to be ... It takes only a moment to cross over from chronos into kairos, but it does take a moment. All that kairos asks is our willingness to stop running long enough to hear the music of the spheres."  


Deep and far out. Sarah is the author of a book called "The Simple Abundance Daybook" and has a web site: www.simpleabundance.com  


Once again and since I don't function well in large, noisy crowds, I will be ringing in the new year at home with family and felines.  We will celebrate with music, colourful Christmas lights, tasty treats and a bottle of Ice Cuvée VQA.  


I will let my structured and creative sides merge long enough to explore New Year mandalas. I'm willing to try just about anything once.  


Another celebration will be upon us in less than a month.  The quiet, creative and brave Year of the Rabbit will make way for the Water Dragon.  With the Year of the Rabbit novel behind me, I look forward to exploring new projects and realms in 2012 and beyond.


Wishing a Happy, Healthy New Year to family, friends and kindred spirits.  


One problem is... I may not be able to help finish that bottle of bubbly for very long after midnight.  We may have to open it sooner.  Besides, it's already New Years somewhere in the world ;o) 

T

Tis the Season

Yes, giftmas is upon us.  


Family and friends gather to share in good cheer, attempting to brighten up the long, dark winter days.  Some exchange gifts during their visits.  I think wine and chocolate are the safest and most-popular.  


People are scrambling for deals in the retail stores or online.  Good-hearted individuals and groups are making efforts to ensure the less-fortunate will have a good Christmas.  I am sure that we all feel for the children and adults who are struggling financially and emotionally this time of year - and beyond.  


As a single parent, I agree.  


Soon I will have to venture out into the malls to pick up a few items requested by my offspring.  One has a birthday just after Christmas and convinced me that only one present will bring happiness although it happens to be one of those expensive electronic distractions.  Since this child is working on a masters degree (insert gush of pride here), I will bite my tongue and strive to accommodate that request.  


We tried the pared-down gifting approach a couple of years ago.  I don't think it went over well. Now that we are in smaller living quarters, they are not impressed that we do not have room for our artificial tree. We'll work something out to decorate this petit apartment with festive colour and cheer.  It will be the first Christmas here and hard to measure up to our previous, spacious abode.  Even the cats  >^..^<  agree that there isn't as much room here to roam, lurk and express their own creativity. 


And lets not forget the significance of this time of celebration.  The gifting represents the gifts of the Magi who were delayed in arriving at the stable.  Their only GPS reference was the bright, guiding star.  They also didn't stop to ask for directions.  (pause for feminist quips)


The birth of the child represents hope for a troubled empire.  If one were to wax poetic and philosophical, the birth can represent a rebirth within ourselves to see our world again as one full of hope and joy, putting aside resentments and conflicts.  This is why we make those silly New Year's resolutions. Kudos to those who want to quit smoking and other vices.  Respects to those who want to conquer harmful habits and thoughts. 


We are an interesting mix of individuals but with some effort and collaboration, we can be unified in our goal to cure humanity of its ailments.  Two of the worst are fear and greed.  Hopefully the occupy movement and efforts by a few super-rich individuals helped give some consciences a stir.  Although some people can be shamed into change by positive peer pressure, I think the actions have to be fully their own choice.  Else, there will be a lingering resentment.  


It puzzles my pretty blonde head how people who have so much don't want to part with just a bit that would improve the lives of many others.  I challenge fortune and welcome the opportunity to be put in that position :o)  


In my novel, The Year of the Rabbit, the birth of a child also represented hope and joy.  Although baby Harry was the product of a shameful teen pregnancy, his arrival brought joy into many people's lives - especially that of lonely, young Sera.  


Coming full circle with the gifting theme, I will end this post with a discount offer for those who wish to purchase the Ebook version of The Year of the Rabbit, A Novel about Fate, Family and Forgiveness.  If you ventured out or online to purchase an EReader for a loved one, why not add this bittersweet tale to the list of books too? It's available in many supported formats. While considering, scroll down my Smashwords ebook page to watch a funny video of Geneva Tabby cat, my meuws, inspiration and distraction.  


If you have gathered any wisdom from this pensive post, it's that the world needs more love, compassion and... funny cat videos.  If you are not YET convinced about the novel, check out the comments from readers of the first print edition.   


Thanks for dropping by.  Next time, bring wine or chocolate :o) 


T








  

Frog Princes and Ancient Wisdom

On a typical Saturday morning, I'd be in my pajamas until noon, sipping coffee, writing, tapping on the keyboard or puttering around our tiny abode.  Yesterday was an exception.  On one of the coldest, breeziest autumn mornings in the Ottawa Valley, I took two buses downtown to attend an event at City Hall.  Did I mention this was on a Saturday morning? What in the world would make me sacrifice my cherished "me" time to venture out in this weather and subject myself to the eclectic crowds of weekend public transit?

Yesterday was 2011 Friends for Peace Day, at Jean Pigott Place. The 9th annual Celebrate Friends for Peace Day is on the first Saturday of October. Friends for Peace is a nonprofit organization and works for peace, planetary care and social justice. One of the organizers is a member of my writing group.  He's also a wonderful man, surrounded and supported by wonderful, committed people. 

I was hoping to meet a friend there as well.  Due to our loosely made plans and my forgetfulness to confirm, she was waiting at home for my call.  I have since apologized with intentions that we get together for lunch this coming week.  In a way though, it's a good thing I forgot.  If I were to apply the belief in fate or divine intervention, I could offer that something made me forget... for a reason. 

Don't run away!  Please continue reading about my solitary journey. You may find it interesting.  That's right, take your hand off the mouse or touch pad thingie and just scroll down.  Go with the flow...

The morning attendance was a little sparse.  Not many audience members were willing to take part in the dancing and vocalizing activities that encouraged participation on the stage.  To less open-minded folk, it may have seemed a little "airy fairy" and would require some "herbal inhalation" prior to engagement ;o^ 

With catlike elusiveness, I retreated to the back of the room where I chatted with acquaintances, toured around the silent auction tables and wrote down my bids on various items.  Aside from books and practical items, an adorable ceramic frog candle holder tickled my fancy.  He was the cutest frog prince I had seen in a long time.  Jaded, with a touch of bitterness and a sprinkle of dark humour, I figured he would be a crowning consolation for the number of toads I've had to kiss in my life time.  I chortled as I out-bidded a gentleman in line ahead of me.

The afternoon activities were well-attended, especially the Orkidstra performances and the awards ceremony with special guest, Mayor Jim Watson.  Ode to Joy, Lean on Me and other songs lifted our spirits and sealed the bond of peace and connectedness.  Peace and love were in the air :o)

During a lull, I toured around the exhibitors and made another round of the silent auction tables.  What's this?  That guy was outbidding me on the frog candle holder!  A strange, competitive force came over me.  I was determined to win that frog so I upped the offer once again before I turned to explore the exhibitor booths.

Carol's Jewelry Box booth appealed to my love for The Tree of Life, as relates to the Egyptian print still in storage since our move in May and... to the beloved cherry tree in my novel.  Carol's table was adorned with gem stone pendants in different colours and sizes.  I decided that a Tree of Life pendant would make a lovely souvenir - something to wear as a talisman while I write poetry, purple prose and inspirational blog posts ;o)  I'm wearing it now. 

While I was strolling around and smiling at folks, one of the exhibitors from the east coast engaged me in conversation about his involvement in Aboriginal initiatives.  He mentioned several services he provided and responded politely when I questioned if some of them were perhaps in the category of "new age" medicine.  We shared an interest in ancient wisdom by indigenous peoples around the world.  I expressed my interest in aboriginal mythology - especially the trickster rabbit (and took advantage of the opportunity to mention the novel as I handed him one of my business cards).  In response to the "Fate, Family and Foregiveness" description, he stated "Things happen for a reason" and suggested that I try his Australian Wildlife Wisdom cards.

"What? Are they like Tarot cards?" I asked, resisting the usual rolling of the eyes.

"No," he replied as he dug into his bag of tricks and pulled out a small flat box covered with what I could describe as a psychedelic pattern.  Inside was a deck of cards, each with an animal character on one side.  The box also contained a book with descriptions of each animal and what they could represent to the card holder.  He suggested that I find a quiet place to sit, shuffle the cards then pull one out and read about it. 

What's the harm?  I was tired from walking around and being surrounded by the noisy crowd.  Even for a peace festival, I was feeling a little overwhelmed.  I found a bench in the relatively quiet foyer of a side entrance.  I shuffled the deck.  I shuffled and shuffled then pulled out a card. 

It was the Rabbit. 

I laughed nervously then braced my cynicism as I opened the little guide book.  Without giving away details of my current life journey, one of the key things I took away from the description was the risk of having too many ideas or offspring (i.e. initiatives and creations).  I knew this.  I have felt this for months.  My pretty blonde head gets full of ideas and I've been juggling creative initiatives for a while.  I had wondered if or when one of the balls would have to drop or become placed in a back pocket for a while.

As my new-found guide was preparing to serve a client, I returned the box and thanked him for the opportunity.  He shared a smile as I revealed that I had pulled the rabbit card.  In the midst of the noisy crowd, what I could discern from his advice was to take away the positive message from the card. 

I mulled that over as I departed on a quest for groceries.  After two bus rides in search of a particular store, I got off at the wrong stop.  I noticed a book shop.  Oooh.  What's the harm in taking shelter from the wind in here for a while?  Besides, I wanted to find a book on Jungian Archetypes so I could do some independent research.  As I browsed the crowded shelves, I felt at home.  CBC Radio 2 was playing in the background.  As I dug through the merged psychology and self help section, I pulled out a book with white and black covers titled "Second Time Around".  Author Anne Lovell provides advice to people on overcoming anxieties of failed relationships and how to build a strong, lasting and rewarding relationship for the future.  Ha! I scoffed bitterly. 

As I turned the book over, I half listened to the radio interview.  The interviewee said, "oh yeah... I also had a rabbit"  Hello?  What?  From what I could harvest from the conversation was that he had been or was a magician. 

Coincidence?  Perhaps.  I bought the book anyway :o\ and proceeded on my way to procure provisions for my family then return home.

Yesterday provided me with quite the little adventure blessed with encounters and opportunities.  After I ate dinner, I settled in to check email and perform some volunteer tasks.  One of the messages was from the silent auction organizers, informing me that my bid had won the coveted frog prince. I laughed out loud, nearly spraying Chai Tea on the Mac. 

Now... was that a lovely coincidence or the result of self-directed destiny?  

~ ~ ~

Thank you for reading this far.  If you like my writing style, you may enjoy reading The Year of the Rabbit, a novel about fate, family and forgiveness.  Sample some excerpts and enjoy feedback from people who read the earlier print version.  I'm pushing the Ebook version with a special discount until October 31, 2011.  No trees were harmed ;o)

T

Supporting Earth-like Life

Recently in the news:  "European astronomers announced the discovery Monday, along with news about 50 other planets outside our solar system, at a U.S. conference. The most exciting of those planets is only the second to be confirmed as lying within what astronomers call the Goldilocks zone: not too hot and not too cold for liquid water to be present – water, of course, being the key to supporting Earth-like life."   

Details at:  http://www.theglobeandmail.com/news/technology/science/newly-discovered-planet-in-the-goldilocks-zone-just-right-to-support-life/article2162816/ 

I appreciate their discovery and report.  My subsequent reaction is... Perhaps we all could remind ourselves, politicians, big dirty, power-hungry industries that we should be maintaining the support of Earth-like life here on Earth itself.

Just saying...

The Naked Journal

Do you gaze with delight or apprehension at the first blank page of a new journal? 

Do you fondle and covet the variety of journals while visiting a greeting card or book store?

At times, I find starting a new journal quite intimidating especially if selected pages are already inscribed with words of wisdom and inspirational quotes.  I have a Celtic Mandala Tree of Life journal that has remained untouched since I purchased it in early 2009.  The cover art and section pages are beautifully designed.  It seems like the crisp, lined pages deserve something better than weekly updates, mundane ponderings and the occasional scribbles of bad poetry. 

While running errands with my daughter yesterday, I was lured by the siren call of the journal display in a local Carlton Cards store.  I oohed and ahhed at the colourful, intricate cover designs offered by the "Paperblanks" selection.  "The journal as functional art" statement caught my fancy.   Carlton Cards was having a sale so I bought two!

Lately, I have found that starting a new journal is like beginning a new phase of a journey or fresh path in one's life.  Do you pause with cautious deliberation before expressing your next words or actions?  Do you jump in with glee, poised with your favourite pen and a mind ripe with ideas?

This morning I completed the pages of a cute little journal I started last autumn, just as we were entering the gray and brown days of November.  That journal helped me navigate thoughts and dreams through the dark, long winter and into the refreshing days of spring.  This morning I transcribed recent observations, accomplishments, social engagements and family outings in that beloved book.  The last page was reserved for a list of goals and dreams. 

I look forward to listing them again in a fresh, new journal.  I look forward to recording the progress of those goals and writing with joy after I realize some dreams. 

Who would have thought someone could dedicate a blog entry to the subject of paper journals?  With the increased use of computer keyboards, smart phones and tablets, I wonder if people will lose that special connection between inspirations of the mind, the hand sweeping with the ink of a pen onto the receptive, blank page.  Will our expanding digital world present different writing skill requirements for school children and eventually eliminate the need for cursive writing?  Although most people can learn to type and transcribe more quickly by using a keyboard, I find that a scary thought.

I will continue to supplement my digital, keyboard writing activities with those of the pen and paper journals.   As I shared with a group of art lovers over a month ago, writing is a form of expression and ongoing therapy and I don't plan on stopping any time soon.  Well, I am taking a bit of a break since releasing the novel and gathering strength to publish an electronic version. 

Of course, intimate contemplations will only be expressed through the loving caress of pen on paper.  Perhaps that special, untouched Tree of Life journal can some day receive final revisions of poetry or inspirational essays. 

Thank you for reading this far.  If you like my writing style, you may enjoy excerpts from my novel, "The Year of the Rabbit". 

T

We are our environment

After work on a Friday night, I attended a book reading and discussion led by Dr. Ian Prattis, hosted at Planet Botanix on Bank Street. 

Ian read from "Earth My Body, Water My Blood", a collection of work he edited based on the initiatives by students in his last class on Ecology and Culture at Ottawa's Carleton University.

"The book is organized around the great elements – Earth, Water, Air and Fire. The fifth great element – Space – is to penetrate humanity’s consciousness about a better way to live with Mother Earth. This research into establishing eco-communities reflects the shift in mindset required to salvage the global ecosystem for human habitation. Our present values and patterns of consumption are the architects of the present global ecological emergency. We are our environment. "

Ian had praise for the students he taught and expressed joy at the creative ways they were carrying on with the work. Judging from the comments and questions raised by the intimate audience, it seemed that Ian was preaching to the converted.  Regardless, he reminded us that we could still be participants in change and become mentors to younger generations. 

In addition to purchasing a signed copy of the book, I acquired some walking tips from Ian who is also a teacher of Buddhist meditation.  I hope to learn more as time allows and apply it to the calming times of my busy, urban life.

On the second bus ride of my slow journey home, my apprehensions were echoed by fellow riders when the rainfall increased its intensity on the windows and rooftop.  I was indeed prepared with an umbrella that I pulled from my bag but sighed at the fact that I was wearing sandals.  The dark, windy walk home from the bus stop was not pleasant.  I was bombarded by the elements of water and air plus a bit of earth due to the sandy grit that embedded inconveniently into my soggy sandals. 

Ah, yes.  I was becoming one with my environment.

Call of Duty?

My knuckles are gradually healing since an encounter with a neighbour. 

This Canada Day I chose to remain cool and comfortable at home while listening to the festivities, interviews and Royal sightings on CBC Radio.  I had no desire for "being there" among thousands of noisy, sweaty bodies in downtown Ottawa.  I enjoyed hearing that Rick Mercer was among the celebrities in Kandahar, marking the last Canada Day that the troops would spend in war torn Afghanistan.  I was proud to hear about new Canadian citizens being sworn in on that special Day.

I appreciated the down time in my new home after a hectic week of obligations, appointments and meetings.  I wrote, sorted through digital photographs from two offspring's recent graduations. (insert fuzzy proud feeling and a big sigh of relief!)  I shared news, thoughts and pictures with friends and relatives via email while reading their updates on family, health issues and recent accomplishments.  I followed up on activities to promote my novel.   It was a satisfying way to spend the warm day in the privacy and quiet of my little apartment.

That was until...

It started with what sounded like random drumbeats coming from our neighbour's place.  This was not the usual boom, boom, boom music vibrating through the wall and floor that we unfortunately share.  After a half hour, I concluded it was either the sound effects from a action movie they were watching or... a video game.  The sound grew louder and louder.  The gun fire became more intense. 

The sound of machine guns vibrating through our home became too much to bear.   Those who know my history are aware of my aversion to loud noises and violence.  I once again state my appreciation of family, friends and professionals who helped me get through the rough times and PTSD. 

After another twenty minutes of this barrage, I braved myself to seek out the source.  Dressed in frumpy, casual attire and without makeup, I had to go out of my way to knock on my neighbour's door. There was no answer yet I could hear the hoots and male grunts from inside accompanying the gun fire. 

I knocked again.  No answer. Augh! Frustration.  I had to wait for a lull in the video game combat in order to knock again and again and actually be heard. 

Finally, the door opened.  I was greeted by a good looking, buff young man (oh my!) wearing shorts and no shirt (oh my, my!).  My frustration was briefly overcome by flirtatious thoughts.   I was next aware of how haggard and unfeminine I must have appeared.  

Not wanting to let primal reactions distract me from my objective, I breathlessly introduced myself.  

He returned my greeting.  

I stammered nervously and politely, conveying to him that we shared the same wall and... and floor and... and... I could hear - I could FEEL the sound in my apartment.  

He apologized, said they'd turn the volume down, adding that they were just kicking back and getting ready to head out soon.

I thanked him then turned to leave.  He wished me a Happy Canada Day.  I think I grunted in response. 

Things have been pretty quiet since.  As I rub my sore knuckles and wring my hands, I shake my head at the entertainment and lifestyle choices of a few.  I think about those new Canadian citizens who escaped war zones in order to make a better life for their families.  I think about Canadian and Coalition soldiers who have risked life and limb, striving to maintain peace and order in Afghanistan.  Let's hope that disruptive actions of a few do not interfere as others adapt and heal, settling peacefully into their new homes. 

For the Love of Older Women

No, I'm not referring to the 1978 movie In Praise of Older Women but it likely caught the attention of a few mature men out there, eh?  Or perhaps people were thinking this was a Mother's Day reference? 

This starts out as more of a self-assurance observation.  In a recent professional setting, someone assumed I was part of a "different age range" as in, older than my actual age.  At first I was taken aback.  That was the first time that I can remember when someone did NOT think I looked younger than my age.  Using a tool called "benign interpretation", I turned this around considering that perhaps this person thought I was more mature and wise than my biological age.  That's right... I turned it into a compliment!

I like being seen as a mature, intelligent woman who has many creative, productive years ahead of her.  I am a woman, a mother and a crone in training.  To balance and complement these feminine roles, I also like to nurture my inner child.

With Mother's Day coming up this Sunday, I look forward to my own young folk helping to prepare meals and tidy up in the kitchen.  That will give me more time to reflect, sort and pack for our move - as well as allow for some creative activities.  I also invite visitors to read a post in honour of Marie Fletcher, the mother of the nature child / heroine in The Year of the Rabbit. 

What is Family?

If you were to Google "what is family?" you would get about 1,460,000,000 results.  

According to an imperfect Wikipedia article, "In human context, a family (from Latin: familiare) is a group of people affiliated by consanguinity, affinity, or co-residence. In most societies it is the principal institution for the socialization of children. "

The key point here is about children.  Children need a stable, healthy environment in which to learn and grow.  Without sounding cliché, I feel it is important to state that children are our future.  If they are nurtured and taught well, they will be responsible, well-balanced members of society.  If they are led by good examples, they will be ready to take on their roles in their own families, communities and our beautiful world.

Last night, two of the offspring and I watched The Kids Are All Right on Rogers on Demand.  It was a welcomed form of entertainment after a cold, wet afternoon of slogging around slushy streets to view our future community and a potential new home.

The family portrayed in the movie was certainly unconventional and non-traditional.  The story though encourages us to ask the question about family.  Can a family consist of children and two parents of the same gender?  Can a family be headed by a single parent?  Can it be one parent and one child?

In my novel The Year of the Rabbit, young Sera is presented with this question as her own family makeup changes as do the ones around her.  She struggles to understand while she loses and gains family members.

I have been the head of my own family as a single parent for seven years.  It hasn't been easy but is much more preferable to what we lived with for many years prior.  Although we have had emotional struggles and hurdles, I am hopeful that we can continue as a healthy, loving family.  

The kids are all right.