Empty wine rack, overflowing heart

My wine rack is empty and my heart is full of joy from gifting bottles since my wine country tour.

Over the past three months, I have been preoccupied.  It was nice to meet up with family, friends or readers of my novel to chat, to see them smile as I delivered gifts of wine.  It felt good to satisfy the list of requests or at least provide a suitable alternative.

It was an interesting endeavour and adventure.  

I'm not sure how soon I will be able to travel again or have the energy to organize such a project.  We're planning on uprooting le petit apartement.  Let the downsizing and de-cluttering begin (again). Problem is that Plan A of moving me and the cats to a smaller, affordable apartment have been put on the back burner.  Plan B will involve finding an affordable, roomy and secure home for me, the cats and the young adult children who are still residing in the crowded nest.  Current economic conditions or bureaucratic processes have not been in line with their plans.
  
The best laid plans of mice and men...

I have also been immersed in a few personal and professional projects, marking a few milestones, cutting back with some obligations, and reading.  I have also been enjoying the usual holiday season gatherings that require socializing, consumption of tasty foods - and various spirits.  

Permit me to pause, to wish each of my readers a happy, healthy holiday season.   May your gifting activities involve giving of your skills, your time and not due to imposed societal or consumer obligations. 

Ours will be a humble yet colourful, crowded and warm celebration this year. At least the cats didn't decorate our tree  >^..^< 

Until I am blessed with a well-balanced, gainfully employed significant other or a wealthy private patron (wink, wink), I will continue to work for a living. Goodness knows that one has to be a damn good writer in order to make a living as an author!

During lunch with an artist friend last week, the word "Transitions" came up.  We talked about changing one's name, acting one's age, maturing, becoming wiser and realizing that it's time to stop being a bottle blonde (for her at least). 

During lunch with another friend, we discussed changes, relationships, careers and vocations - of being content with a decent pay cheque while having the time, energy and compassion to be of service to others.  

It is often demonstrated by characters in my novel, that one reason for existing on this beautiful planet is to be compassionate, to be of service to others.  

On that note, thanks for dropping by, for reading this far. You are very patient and kind :o)  

See you in the New Year.

T

Mother's Day 2013

Well, it's Mother's Day and I'm awake before the kids.  

A couple of young folk offered to prepare me a breakfast of ham, eggs and fruit.  

All the family was together last night for an early celebration since I will be travelling for work over the next few days.  One thoughtful young person got me a bouquet of tulips on Thursday evening.  I'm looking at them, admiring them now as I type this entry.  

 

Other than gifts of flowers, chocolate or scented candles, my children know better than to purchase me "things" for Mother's Day or other celebrations.  I prefer the offer of time and labour or new experiences.  

It's the gift of time spent together, sharing experiences that I appreciate most. 

Since work schedules and the weather didn't cooperate, we didn't get out to the Tulip Festival or a restaurant dinner yesterday.  We settled for pizza delivery and a viewing of Super 8 on Netflix.  That movie will likely become another family favourite, first viewed on the big screen in 2011.  It's like ET meets The Goonies. 

Movies are less scary when viewed on a 20 inch screen and you get to control the noise level.  

I also like being able to pause the movie when people need to use the washroom or blow their runny noses due to allergies. 

I wanted to take this moment to express my love and appreciation for my beautiful children.   I have hope for them as they deal with past hurts, looking forward as they navigate individual, meandering paths in this confusing yet beautiful world.  Heck, at times it feels like I'm renegotiating my own. 

On this day I also think about my relationship with my own Mother who passed away almost 30 years ago.  Despite her self-imposed martyrdom, she was a good Mother.  She meant well, being dealt the hand she had with living in near-poverty and raising eleven children.  Being a good Catholic, one of her frequent mantras was, "God looks after the Mothers.".  She was a woman of deep faith.  

Sometimes, all we have to live on are faith - and hope.  

Here's to the mothers, real and imagined.   

Before I pack and while I wait for that breakfast, I think I'll have another cup of instant coffee and a serving of toast with jam.  This could take a while...
 
Thanks for dropping by.

T
 

Revival

Spring is here and it snowed in the Ottawa Valley - on April Fool's Day. 

That's okay, it already melted and is providing water for the grass, flowers and trees. I hope we get more rain.  Yep, this is one of my favourite seasons - except for the muck and smell of dog pooh around our neighbourhood.  

In case you weren't aware, the Christian holiday of Easter occurs during spring.  Since I'm a lapsed Catholic, I shouldn't attempt to provide any insights.  I just like the timing of this meaningful religious holiday with the pagan celebrations.  I respect the theme of revival and renewal. 


I cherish the bursting greens and pretty blossoms, cool days and nights before the sticky, humid days of summer.

I also like the opportunities for consuming delicious chocolate.  As for the little chicks and bunnies that have wiggled their way into this holiday, please resist the urge to give a bunny rabbit as an Easter gift.  

What you could do is give yourself a copy of The Year of the Rabbit ebook.  One of the main characters is a priest.  Another is his daughter. 

Curious? Thought so. Write to Florence T. Lyon before April 30th and she'll send you the secret code to obtain a free copy from Smashwords. 

Have a wonderful Easter week and enjoy what time you can get with your family.  

T

Can't buy her love

Well, we can't avoid it.  The most heart-breaking and emotionally-charged celebration is sneaking up on us.  Yaaayyyy...

We're constantly bombarded with ads for what's hot, what's new, what happy lovers should look like and what's expected of sweethearts to give.  

For us single, jaded, older gals, it isn't a very welcomed time of year - except for the discounts on chocolate come February 15th.  Can I just curl up and sleep through that dreadful day?


Guys, hold off on the flowers.  Save a rose bush – buy your lover a book. Save a tree – buy an Ebook!   Even better, how about a FREE Ebook?  Sound good?  Better than some shiny bling? Well, you can get a free copy of my 2011 novel, The Year of the Rabbit until the clock strikes midnight on Valentine's Day.  Visit this page and follow the easy instructions.


Thanks for stopping by and not waking the grumpy old puss.  You can just leave that box of chocolates by the door.
  
T


 

Tis the Season

Yes, giftmas is upon us.  


Family and friends gather to share in good cheer, attempting to brighten up the long, dark winter days.  Some exchange gifts during their visits.  I think wine and chocolate are the safest and most-popular.  


People are scrambling for deals in the retail stores or online.  Good-hearted individuals and groups are making efforts to ensure the less-fortunate will have a good Christmas.  I am sure that we all feel for the children and adults who are struggling financially and emotionally this time of year - and beyond.  


As a single parent, I agree.  


Soon I will have to venture out into the malls to pick up a few items requested by my offspring.  One has a birthday just after Christmas and convinced me that only one present will bring happiness although it happens to be one of those expensive electronic distractions.  Since this child is working on a masters degree (insert gush of pride here), I will bite my tongue and strive to accommodate that request.  


We tried the pared-down gifting approach a couple of years ago.  I don't think it went over well. Now that we are in smaller living quarters, they are not impressed that we do not have room for our artificial tree. We'll work something out to decorate this petit apartment with festive colour and cheer.  It will be the first Christmas here and hard to measure up to our previous, spacious abode.  Even the cats  >^..^<  agree that there isn't as much room here to roam, lurk and express their own creativity. 


And lets not forget the significance of this time of celebration.  The gifting represents the gifts of the Magi who were delayed in arriving at the stable.  Their only GPS reference was the bright, guiding star.  They also didn't stop to ask for directions.  (pause for feminist quips)


The birth of the child represents hope for a troubled empire.  If one were to wax poetic and philosophical, the birth can represent a rebirth within ourselves to see our world again as one full of hope and joy, putting aside resentments and conflicts.  This is why we make those silly New Year's resolutions. Kudos to those who want to quit smoking and other vices.  Respects to those who want to conquer harmful habits and thoughts. 


We are an interesting mix of individuals but with some effort and collaboration, we can be unified in our goal to cure humanity of its ailments.  Two of the worst are fear and greed.  Hopefully the occupy movement and efforts by a few super-rich individuals helped give some consciences a stir.  Although some people can be shamed into change by positive peer pressure, I think the actions have to be fully their own choice.  Else, there will be a lingering resentment.  


It puzzles my pretty blonde head how people who have so much don't want to part with just a bit that would improve the lives of many others.  I challenge fortune and welcome the opportunity to be put in that position :o)  


In my novel, The Year of the Rabbit, the birth of a child also represented hope and joy.  Although baby Harry was the product of a shameful teen pregnancy, his arrival brought joy into many people's lives - especially that of lonely, young Sera.  


Coming full circle with the gifting theme, I will end this post with a discount offer for those who wish to purchase the Ebook version of The Year of the Rabbit, A Novel about Fate, Family and Forgiveness.  If you ventured out or online to purchase an EReader for a loved one, why not add this bittersweet tale to the list of books too? It's available in many supported formats. While considering, scroll down my Smashwords ebook page to watch a funny video of Geneva Tabby cat, my meuws, inspiration and distraction.  


If you have gathered any wisdom from this pensive post, it's that the world needs more love, compassion and... funny cat videos.  If you are not YET convinced about the novel, check out the comments from readers of the first print edition.   


Thanks for dropping by.  Next time, bring wine or chocolate :o) 


T








  

Small companions, small defenders

It is comforting to know that the "...Ottawa Police Teddy Bear Program is being re-launched through the generous contributions of staff tips from several downtown Bridgehead Coffee Shops. Staff of Bridgehead Coffee Shops agreed to donate their pennies to purchase teddy bears for children who have been involved in a crisis. The cuddly companion can help ease a child’s stress after a traumatic event."

"The Bear Mission - The plush teddy bears are for officers to use as a therapeutic tool to comfort, console and calm distressed children, since they are often the first to arrive at emergency scenes."

Read the full release:

Ottawa Police Equipped with Cuddly Companions for Children in Need
14/02/2011


This news release comes at a bittersweet time for me.  Seven years ago, after a violent incident in our former home, my children were consoled by the social workers at the Ottawa Police station.  Each child was offered to choose from a selection of stuffed animals.  At that time, there were more than just bears to choose.  The social worker and officer on the case were compassionate enough to abide by my children's wishes to send one of the toys to me as I recovered in the hospital.  This rabbit toy is featured in my short story called Small Defenders.  Writing the story was a form of therapy and a way to thank the many emergency people and members of our community who came to our aid although I was still embarrassed and in disbelief.  The story also features the poorly functioning machines that dole out pain killer dosages as researched in the book The Human Factor by Kim Vicenti. 

Small Defenders (Short story - Ottawa Jewels 2006 ISBN 1-897357-09-5)
See a PDF version

I am a survivor who is still facing disturbing hurdles.  Being a single parent, it is challenging to cope as I struggle to understand the problems my children experience.  I work hard at "keeping it together".  For the past few weeks, I have been dealing with the long-known fact that my attacker is appealing his sentence and I am now aware there will be a hearing later this month.  Through a technique learned in a support group, I am practicing radical acceptance in knowing that I cannot change reality nor control the outcome of particular situations.  I trust that the issue is in good hands as they review the facts.   

I am also dealing with the reality that the parole board hearings will take place later this year.  To say the least, this drags up bad memories and anxieties.  I started preparing for this over a year ago but lately it has become more of a disturbing reality.  Thank goodness for family, friends and therapy.  I am alive.  I still have my children with me.  I still have my sanity.  I still have that feisty, purple rabbit. 

T

Sexist public information film about eCards on Valentine's Day

It's funny, except for the "... probably blonde" part. 

Safe computing, all your hopeful lovers!  Thank you, Sophos Naked Security blog. 

T

Pet Peeves and Conciliations

Finally!  A day of rest.  

This week of vacation was peppered with family roller-coaster rides (of the emotional kind), many appointments and meetings.  

The felines of the house >^..^< went for their medical checkups and shots.  >^..^<  I advised the animal hospital staff to keep it to the minimum and no, I can't afford to have their friggin' teeth cleaned. 

They're not even "my" cats (well, who owns a cat, anyway?).  One was adopted from the animal shelter five years ago as a birthday present for one of my own offspring.   The other was gladly received from another family's home (one with loud, overly affectionate children) and as I thought at the time, would be a good companion for cat #1. Cat #1 established her position as Alpha cat.

Cat #2 needs special, expensive food so as to prevent urinary tract problems.  Cat #1 likes eating the food too.  No harm in that for her but that means I have to purchase this food twice as often as needed.  Give the cat another canary, as my dear old Dad used to say...

One consolation through these stre$$ful visits, was the courteous, caring transportation service provided by Ottawa Pet Cab.  Thank you :-)


People should think of these things before getting a new pet (especially one for a child and the parents end up caring for it...)  As I go through our downsizing project, I ponder the costs and benefits of our furry family members.  When we choose a new location, I will likely be tempted to move "pet friendly" from the "nice to have" to "must have" checklist category. I'm soft-hearted, that way.

On the subject of pets - especially in the approaching year of the rabbit next month, please, please resist impulses to purchase a pet bunny.  They require more care than you may think. 


Thanks for reading.  Have a peaceful, caring day.

Ah, the musical cloistered life...

Cloistered nuns cinch record deal    
From CBC.ca July 25, 2010

French Benedictines to record Gregorian chant for British label

"When you hear the sound of nuns chanting, it's like an immediate escape from the challenges, stresses, pace and noise of modern living," noted Lewis back in March when Decca, an arm of Universal Music, posted the search notice.

"This is a sound of something ancient, unchanging and timeless."

Read more: http://www.cbc.ca/arts/music/story/2010/07/25/nuns-record-chant.html 

This would make a nice gift - for me :-)  I would love to listen to the CD (or MP3...) while taking time out and reading sections from Seven Sacred Pauses: Living Mindfully Through the Hours of the Day by Macrina Wiederkehr.  I acquired my copy at the Blessing Tree Bookstore during a writers' retreat last year. It surely has helped get me through some demanding days. 

Not wanting to offend

This past week, a friend who helps me with my house cleaning came back from a trip overseas. She gave us some lovely jewelry and an ornamental tea set from the Middle East. I was touched that she thought to bring us a gift. I was also worried about where to put it!

It's Christmas morning and there are no presents under our tree

Don't feel bad for us. I planned this intentionally.

I wanted to address the wastefulness of the commercialized season and the clutter it brings to our lives.

In younger years when my children received or exchanged a few Christmas gifts, we would not always use wrapping paper. We put them in the reusable gift bags that you can buy at any dollar store along with sheets of reusable tissue paper. Some of these came from family and friends in previous years.

This year is a different one because I did not get pricey gifts for them. First of all, as a single parent, I cannot afford it. Second, I don't like venturing into crowded malls (or places period). I didn't even venture online to spend plastic.

I'm sure the words "Grinch" or "Scrooge" bounced around in their heads when I informed them weeks ago that we would not be getting presents this year. Instead, we would be redirecting funds to the young parents of a new member of our extended family as well as a few of our chosen charities. They seemed receptive to the idea, especially now that they are no longer "children". They seemed to accept and embrace the warm feeling of giving.

My growing children will still receive stocking stuffers of the chocolate kind and a bit of pocket money. They will also be able to share in a few feasts and celebrations with more family. Unfortunately, the older ones will have to work on boxing day as they are servants to retail, helping shoppers find bargains that fit or ... return unwanted gifts.